Monday, February 7, 2011

Protecting my sources

Because of its Top Secret nature, I can neither confirm nor deny that the following conversation was recorded between the leaders of Thailand and Cambodia:

"That temple, she belongs to me!"

"No you motherless frog, the temple is a holy place for my people."

"May God rain down a thousand deaths for you stealing our temple."

"God will surely make our bullets fly true as we shoot dead your soulless peoples."

"You shut up!"

"No, you shut up!"

It only gets worse from there as Thailand and Cambodia shoot across their borders at each other over a temple.

There are some things in the world that I don't understand.  For example, killing people in the name of peace.  Or Justin Bieber.  Or how the GOP get elected with a platform of "Spend no money unless it's for me and my rich friends."

Aside from that, I think I pretty much understand everything.  Comes with being a superhero. (There was an exam).

Someone (Monya) posted a snippet about jails that got me thinking.  If I wasn't so busy saving the world, how would I reform our prison system.

First of all, I would take the "resort" out of the system.

All food would be tasteless gruel with water.
No television
No visitors
No phones
No recreation time
You get a cell with a sink and a bed.  No pillow.
No doctor but there is a dentist that can only do one thing - pull teeth.
Your picture is posted on the web so everyone can see you and why you are there.

You get sentenced to a certain number of hours of labor.  A day off means no time comes off your sentence. 

There is no death penalty, costs too much and does not deter.

That should take care of that.

On to bigger things.

Egypt's government is being overthrown because the revolution went viral.  Eventually, when the internet is unblockable, what do you think will happen in North Korea or China.  Billions of people are going to suddenly find that they can take back their lives.  When everyone in China has access to perfect information, heads will roll and those heads will come from the very top.   You heard it hear first.

Is it just me or has anyone else noticed that we, as a country, sometimes jump in bed with the worst kinds of people?  The Shah of Iran, Noriega, Bin Ladin and now this guy from Egypt.  They have all been on our payroll at one time or another.  And these are just the ones we know about.  Maybe they were just the lesser of two evils.  I always feel a little embarrassed when someone like Mubarak turns out to not only be a dictator but someone that is on our payroll.

Health Tip for your dog.  Do not feed your dog Chipolata Black Been Vegetarian burgers.  If mine so much as licks the plate, he produces enough gas to inflate the Goodyear blimp.  With the right attachments, I could use him to inflate my car tires.

Anyway, there is a world out there that needs saving so I'd better be going.

Up, up and away...

jim