That's right. The rein of terror that has prevailed in my absence came to a halt the moment I got my cape through customs.
Sorry to blog again so quickly but travel does that to me.
I was in London, at the airport, when the royals kissed on the balcony. People crowded around televisions cheered and clapped. I could see that if he'd just scored a touchdown or something. Actually, looking at Kate, I'd say he scored a big one.
This remains my least favorite airport. It's as if the person that built it had never flown before. There are very few signs and those that you do see are confusing. At one point, I came to a sign as big as a truck. It had an arrow on it pointing Right (->) to Terminal 1. Since I was going to Terminal 1, I went right. I somehow ended up in the Australian outback. I followed a trail of Kit Kat wrappers I'd wisely left in my tracks and got back to the sign. This time, there was a "Sherpa" there directing traffic. I looked at the sign with no idea of how I could have misread it. So I asked.
Me: This sign says go right and when I went right, I ended up on the Siberian Tundra.
Him: Yes, that happens a lot.
Me: What was I suppose to do?
Him: Scoot around the sign on the left side and Then turn right. You turned to early.
Me: How was I supposed to know that?
Him: I'm here to point it out.
Me: Where were you when I came by 10 minutes ago.
Him: On my break. Now move along...there's a good lad.
At first I was confused. Why hire someone to stand there and direct traffic when a better sign would have done just as well. Then it hit me. Tax Breaks. Someone got a tax break and, just like the GOP predicted, they spent it hiring someone to do a job that didn't need to be done. This is known as "Expanding the base" or equally well known as "Ren and Stimpy make a budget plan."
Next I tried to get a coke out of a machine. I put in about 6 Euros and it still wanted more. I gave up and hit the refund button. My change came in the form of 2 fatrthings, a pence, three klingons and some kibble. I'll never understand the money in the UK.
Now here is something that really gets to me. They do this all all European airports. They don't tell you what gate your plane leaves from until 30 minutes before the flight departs. We can tell them hours in advance in the States. I don't know why they do it here. My theory is that they like to watch people on the security cameras as they try to sprint the 8 furlongs (metric thing I think) to their gate before their plane takes off.
Time for a little rest and then off to my high school reunion.
Cherrio!
Up, up and away...
Jim
Sorry to blog again so quickly but travel does that to me.
This remains my least favorite airport. It's as if the person that built it had never flown before. There are very few signs and those that you do see are confusing. At one point, I came to a sign as big as a truck. It had an arrow on it pointing Right (->) to Terminal 1. Since I was going to Terminal 1, I went right. I somehow ended up in the Australian outback. I followed a trail of Kit Kat wrappers I'd wisely left in my tracks and got back to the sign. This time, there was a "Sherpa" there directing traffic. I looked at the sign with no idea of how I could have misread it. So I asked.
Me: This sign says go right and when I went right, I ended up on the Siberian Tundra.
Him: Yes, that happens a lot.
Me: What was I suppose to do?
Him: Scoot around the sign on the left side and Then turn right. You turned to early.
Me: How was I supposed to know that?
Him: I'm here to point it out.
Me: Where were you when I came by 10 minutes ago.
Him: On my break. Now move along...there's a good lad.
At first I was confused. Why hire someone to stand there and direct traffic when a better sign would have done just as well. Then it hit me. Tax Breaks. Someone got a tax break and, just like the GOP predicted, they spent it hiring someone to do a job that didn't need to be done. This is known as "Expanding the base" or equally well known as "Ren and Stimpy make a budget plan."
Next I tried to get a coke out of a machine. I put in about 6 Euros and it still wanted more. I gave up and hit the refund button. My change came in the form of 2 fatrthings, a pence, three klingons and some kibble. I'll never understand the money in the UK.
Now here is something that really gets to me. They do this all all European airports. They don't tell you what gate your plane leaves from until 30 minutes before the flight departs. We can tell them hours in advance in the States. I don't know why they do it here. My theory is that they like to watch people on the security cameras as they try to sprint the 8 furlongs (metric thing I think) to their gate before their plane takes off.
Time for a little rest and then off to my high school reunion.
Cherrio!
Up, up and away...
Jim
