Food For Thought

People are always coming up to me and saying, "Jim, what can I make that is quick, healthy and filled with multiple taste explosions?"

Actually that almost never happens.  And, when I say "almost never", I mean "never."

However, I am ready should it ever come up.

Here is my recipe for Orgasmic Tuna Melt.

As always, make sure you measure everything precisely according to my directions.

In a bowl, stir in 4 or 5 cans of tuna, 1 heaping handful of celery (diced), about a half a red bell pepper (diced), 1 heaping handful of apple (diced), some salt and pepper and about 2 gigantic tablespoons of Mayo or maybe sour cream.  Once you have this concoction, you can keep it in the refrigerator until it starts to smell bad.  When that happens, either throw it out or add some basil and lemon, and then throw it out.

However, it should be good for several days.  So, it's there when you need a quickie.

To make a quick snack, toast two slices of whole wheat bread.  I know that whole wheat bread tastes like cardboard, but toasted, all bread tastes pretty much the same, so toast it.  Then add the mixture from above.  On top of the mixture, put a thin slice of tomato.  Next, put a slice of cheese onto each one and broil.  Be careful not to overcook as this delicacy will turn into charcoal after 5 minutes.  Just wait until the cheese has melted.

Eat.

Now onto politics. Tonight is the first debate between the two candidates for governor in California.  Meg Whitman is the GOP candidate.  She is the former CEO of EBAY and has spend $119 million of her own money to buy the office.  She has no political experience and has never voted.

In the other corner is Jerry Brown.  He has been in politics for his entire life, including a stint as California governor.  My biggest complaint about him is he dated Linda Ronstadt just when I was working up the courage to ask her out.

Here is my prediction of the debate:

A question will be asked.

Whitman will follow a script, giving no details and then turn the topic to Jerry Brown failures.

Brown will talk about past successes and press Whitman for more detail which he knows she does not have.

Let's see if I am correct.

In national news, I was watching Hardball with Chris Matthews.  He had a GOP rep on as well as a democrat.

In the house, the Democrats refuse to vote on the tax-cut issue in the house until they know it will pass in the senate.  The reason is that a half-passed bill is a liability in the upcoming elections.  The GOP, on the other hand says, "We should vote on the bill so the American people know where everyone stands."  However, this same GOP is filibustering in the senate to prevent a vote there so the Democrats will have a half-passed bill going into elections.

When Matthews pressed the GOP guy about the filibuster,  the GOP guy ignored the question and answered something else.

The conversation turned to the GOP Pledge to American.  Matthews said, "You said you would cut wasteful spending.  What specifically will you cut?"  The GOP guy, once again started talking about stuff like "We want to create jobs."  Matthews smiled and shook his head while saying, "You can never get the GOP to tell you what they want to cut because they don't have any idea."

I want to be a Republican.  However, I refuse to join the idiots in charge of the party right now.

I am still waiting on my wife's green card.  It's been almost 2 weeks since they said it was approved and in the mail.  It's no wonder that we have so many undocumented aliens in this country.  It's impossible to come in legally.

I have a lot more to say on that subject but for now, I answer to a different calling...

I have a world to save.

Up, up and away...

j

Lucky Bag

Let's start with the title of today's blog.  The yearbook at the United States Naval Academy is called Lucky Bag; but that is not why I used that name today.  The lost and found locker on a naval vessel is also called the Lucky Bag.  Over time, it gets filled with all sorts of odds and ends.  This is the Lucky Bag that today's blog is named for.

I seem to have no single topic but a lot of small things come to mind.

So let's make a list.

1. A woman, a nurse, in the Air Force was outed after it was discovered that she had a lesbian relationship with a civilian woman off base.  The Air Force fired her and the Justice department ordered her reinstated.  This really shows the bigotry of the Don't Ask Don't tell policy.  This woman behaves as she wants to; in a way that she no doubt finds fulfilling.  She does it on her own time and in a way that has no impact on her performance.  What do we do?  We fire her.  Give me a break!  We fire a nurse because of how she conducts her private life.  So, tens of thousands of dollars now need to be spent to train her replacement.  Lose-lose situation.  Time for a change.

2. It turns out that 2 out of 3 Americans are not happy with Obamacare.  Here is the kick.  They are unhappy because it doesn't do enough!  The GOP has this pledge that they created after listening to the American people.  They want to trash Obamacare.  Seems they quit listening before the American public had a chance to say the WANT MORE, not less.  I am among those that want more.

3.  There is a mouse in my house and I'm not sure how to go about getting rid of it.  My dog pretends to be interested in getting whatever I am looking at under the couch.  However, as soon as I walk away, he takes a nap.

4. I think semi-sweet baking chocolate is good for morale.  Not too sweet so the guilt level is low.

5. I think Obama needs to be more Pro-Business.  It seems that we spend time going between "Make the rich, richer" and "Spread the wealth."  I wonder if it really has to be one or the other.  I recommend that the top salaries of companies can only be a certain multiple of those providing the labor.  It can be a big number, but right now its infinite.  To be fair, when the leaders cut their salaries, labor must do the same.  This way, everyone sinks or swims together.  I also think that profits made from financial schemes need to be taxed at an really high rate.  Right now, a person that trades in money can quickly become a millionaire while contributing nothing to society.

6. A couple of friends have recently lost loved ones (a dad and a son).  I don't know how I would survive the lost of one of my kids.  I probably wouldn't .  Death is always hard on the living.  For those that have died, I think their adventure is just beginning.  We should celebrate their lives here as well as their new beginning.  As for the pain of Grief - it is the price we pay for love.

7. I saw a comprehensive report that showed the number of millionaires created between 2002 and 2007 went through the roof.  At the same time, the average American's household income dropped by $5k a year.  This is the result of GOP economic policy.  So, if we do the same thing again, shouldn't we expect the same result?  I'm just asking.

8. I just read The Grand Design by Stephen Hawking.  In the book, he basically says Science, not God, is responsible for making the universe.  Good for him.  This is something I've suspected since I first heard the story of Adam and Eve.  Maybe I should have written a book about it but I was tied up with second grade art class.  There is no new science in the book and I get the feeling he just wrote it to make a buck or keep his name in the news.  He completely ignored that part of our lives that is non-physical.  For example, how can a mom know her child, a hundred miles away is in trouble?  What is thought?  Is there a soul?  I believe that the physical world is but a small part of our existence.  It may be a big part of this life but what about the one before and the one after?  I give the book a big thumbs down.

9.  I am conducting an experiment.  My business partner created an App for his android phone.  He sells it for about a buck.  However, you can get it for free if you agree to have an advertisement show up on your phone.  If they click the ad, he makes a buck.  So far, he is making way more with his free app and the ad clicking than he is for the paid app without ads.  So, I created another blog.  I put software on it that allows for ads to show up.  Google puts ads on it based on the content of the blog.  So, I write junk that has a lot of interesting keywords.  Things like Android and video games and Xbox.  I need your help to make this work.  Go that blog (http://bookmovietechreview.blogspot.com /) and click on one of the ads.  You don't need to buy anything.  Just click on an ad.

10. Breaking Bad is probably the best written and acted show on television today.

I know it's Sunday and most of you have the day off.  No me.

I have a world to save.

Up, up and away...
j

The Republican Pledge

The GOP has put out a document that is meant to represent their position on several issues.  It is about 8,000 words long, which is about 20 pages.  It has taken them 2 years to put this thing together and it certainly lacks specifics.

Let's take a look "Up Close and Personal."

1, Permanently stop all job-killing tax hikes.   What this really means is that they want to maintain the Bush tax cuts and call a failure to extend an end-date created by Bush, a tax hike.  Here is the deal, if spending stays constant, then any loss of revenue will increase the national debt.  So, this, taken by itself, lowers revenue without impacting spending so the net effect is a bigger national debt.  There is an argument that keeping more money in the hands of the taxpayers will stimulate the economy.  I agree with this.  So, let's put it in the hands of those most likely to spend it.  I am quite certain that a poor person is more likely to spend than a rich person.  Give an extra $500 to a poor person and they will buy food and shelter.  Give $500 to a billionaire and he will put it in a coin jar.  This is why the tax cut extension for those making less than $200K is better then extending it to everyone.  By the way, even the rich will get the tax break on their first $200K.  Additionally, the rich get most of their income through capital gains which is taxed at 15% while the poor are taxed on income which is 25%.  The poor are already paying a higher rate.  This pledge is merely an attempt to cater to the rich.  Not a bad strategy since its the rich that pay $1,000 a plate at fund raisers.  Overall, this gets a Thumbs Down.

2. Give small businesses a tax break.  I am a small business owner.  This is a big plus for me so I am a big supporter of this point.  Thumbs Up.

3. Rein in the red tape in Washington.  I just waded through a ton of that with my wife's immigration issue.  This is where government needs to shrink.  Thumbs Up.

4. Act immediately to reduce spending.  I am mixed on this one.  There is a lot of strong evidence that the stimulus package saved us from a certain depression.  There are those that say much of the money was wasted.  This is way overblown.  The GOP reported about 20 million used to build a wine train to Napa.  In reality, it was used to build anti-flooding zones for the area and part of it meant raising the bridge of the existing wine train so they could build a levi.  This willingness of the GOP to lie about this brings into question all of their other claims of mismanagement.  Also, the GOP will claim we bailed out the banks.  True, but the other half of the story is that the money is now being paid back with a very handsome return (8% on average).  If reduce spending means cutting out the waste, I'm all for it.  However, the GOP is really trying to make us believe the stimulus package was a waste.  That simply is not close to being true.  I give this a Thumbs Down just because of the misleading aspects of it.

5. There are a couple of statements about responsible budgeting.  I am in favor of that in principle.  Thumbs Up.

6. End Tarp.  This is just propaganda.  Every economist of note agrees that the Tarp fund was needed.  The GOP knows this but they are hoping you don't.  Thumbs Down.

7. Root out government waste and duplication.  This feels like a duplication of earlier points and I still agree with it.  Thumbs Up.

8. Replace Obamacare.  My 22 year old daughter has insurance for the first time since she left home at the age of 18.  Thank you Obamacare.  There are a lot of great things about this.  However, I think it is not complete in some places and heavy handed in others.  I would welcome a review of this program but don't drop it until something better is ready to go.  The GOP wants to go after tort reform and I am a big fan.  The GOP wants to take the mandatory coverage out, which is now a big burden on states and I agree with that as well.  I give this a Conditional Thumbs Up.

9. Get tough on terrorists.  Wow!  What a great idea!  How come no one else ever thought of that?  I think this is just political talk.  It implies that Obama wants to open the doors to them.  This is the type of Fear mongering that got me to vote for George W six years ago; a vote I will forever regret.  Thumbs Down on the rationale for including this here.

10. Fully fund missile defense.  You have got to be kidding me.  Who are we getting ready to fight?  Aliens from outer space?  This is more of the "Be afraid and don't worry, we will protect you," strategy of the GOP.  They are reaching back to Ronald Reagan years to find something we all support. They failed to notice that there is no one out there to shoot ICBMs at us.  This is a hugely expensive undertaking.   Why do it?  Especially when Russia is starting to climb into bed with us.  This is pure political BS and I give it a big Thumbs Down.

11.  Get tough on Iran.  I am all for this but I don't think anyone knows how to do that right.  Bush invaded Iraq and Afghanistan and there was nothing there.  To me, getting tough is standing way, way back, and then dropping a few bunker buster bombs on a handful of sites.  Bomb Iran's nuclear sites down to bedrock.  The world might get pissed off but they will get over it.  Let's face it, we are going to piss people off no matter how we handle it. Thumbs Up.

12.  Immigration.  They want to make it tougher to get into the states legally and illegally.  They want fences and more stringent visa management.  I am very familiar with this.  First of all, a 20 foot fence can be scaled with a 21 foot ladder.  The fence will cost billions.  The ladder...maybe twenty bucks.  One of the reasons people come in illegally, is because it is nearly impossible to come in legally.  It took 5 YEARS before my wife could come over.  The United States loses $90 Bn a year because people opt to vacation elsewhere.  Their reason for choosing a new venue - Bush era rules that cause humiliation when then come over to drop off a few paychecks.  My wife has come through several times before we were married.  Nearly every time, she was taken to a back room and scolded for entering the country.  She would come out in tears.  This, in spite of just coming over for a week to visit with a perfectly legal visa.   High school dropouts in uniform guard our borders and airports.  I am all for fixing immigration.  The GOP's politically sweet sounding sound bites on this issue are way, way off the mark.  A big Thumbs Down.

Overall, I'm glad the GOP finally said they stand for something.  This is the first time they haven't just said, "No, we can't support that."  I would like to encourage them to keep thinking about ways to make our country better.  However, this "pledge" still reeks of political spin.

I would write my own pledge but I'm too busy - I have a world to save.

Up, up and away...

j

"You shut Up" - "No you shut up."

To quote a great American, "Why can't we all just get along?"  I'm not sure of the date, but Rodney King said that at some point after recovering from his Officer Induced behavior modifiers.

I am constantly amazed that everyone does not agree with me 100% of the time.  How can we all have the same information and then reach different conclusions?

I'm not saying its a bad thing; it just surprises me.

I remember when my daughter was born.  A part of me said, "Make sure to buy her dolls and stuff so she knows she's a girl."  This was not a homophobic thought.  It was more due to an uncertainty about the role of environment on a child's development.  Anyway, she turned into a girl.

Later, my youngest son was born.  For some reason, he immediately started doing "boy" things.  I didn't need to buy him toy trucks.  It was just natural for him to see what parts of the dog were removable.

My lesson was that boys will be boys and girls will be girls - or not - all without my input.

So, are we born Republican or Democrat?

On one of my recent posts, I waxed political for a bit.  My sister (aka Patty) responded with "Nice post although I don't always agree with everything in it.  My mom (aka my mom) also responded with nearly the identical comment.  So, Mom and Patty don't agree with everything I said in the post.  That's fine with me.   The interesting part is that the part that one disagreed with was very likely the part that the other did agree with (and vice versa).

How can this be?  One raised the other so there had to be some influence - right?

This leads me to a story, one that actually happened.

I took an MBA course about 15 years ago.  One day, we broke into groups; they do that a lot in MBA classes.  Each group was told that they had been in a plane crash in a remote part of Alaska.  Each group had a list of 20 items.  Their task was to prioritize the 20 items to keep in order to maximize their chances of survival

This was a lot of fun.  It turns out that there is a right answer to this problem.  Newspaper, for example, makes an excellent insulator so it was more important than a gun.  I was in favor of a gun.  When the professor answered that a handgun would be of little use against a Kodiac bear, I explained that it would of great use in keeping my fellow passengers in line. Plus, if we were stranded a long time, it was way easier to hunt passengers than bears.

The bottom line was that we had fun and in the end, we all agreed to the logic behind the "right" answer.

Then we broke out in groups again (see, I told you we did that a lot).

This time, we were put in charge of a YMCA that had to cut programs to make its budget.  So it came down to cutting youth baseball or senior activities or AIDs counseling or any number of other activities.  My group, in fact all of the groups, found this to be a very hard and frustrating task.  You could hear the arguments from other groups through the walls.

It turns out that there was no right answer to this situation.

This time we were arguing about values.   The purpose of the exercise had been for us to see that not all arguments are about objectivity.  Many are about values and you can't simple solve the issue with a calculator.  It's like trying to change someone's religion or better yet, like trying to teach a pig to sing.  It doesn't work and it annoys the pig.

On to more meaningful stuff.

My coffee clutch was doing its random thing when someone (Scott) wondered out loud how he should go about cooking a banana slug.  I asked if he had a Banana Slug and he said no but he may want to blog about it.  I asked if he had a blog and he said no but if he did, he would want to be ready to talk about cooking a Banana Slug.

This all sounded reasonable so we dove in.  I suggested poaching it.  My thought was that you could make an Eggs Benedict type thing out of it and we all know that everything tastes great with enough Hollandaise Sauce on it.  Someone suggested we could microwave it but that was quickly shot down.  If there is any way to make a Banana Slug explode, it would be to put it into a microwave.  We had just begun to discuss the virtues of a sauteed Banana Slug when we heard one of the women nearby say something that sounded like, "Red Panties."  All of the men became instantly silent and leaned slightly towards the women.

The women seemed to notice this and quickly moved off onto another topic.  As did we.  Who is going to eat a Banana Slug anyway?

I wish I could stay but the world out there needs me...

Up, up and away...

j

Why to blog?

I mentioned to my business partner that writing my blog was Cathartic.  Not too long after that I decided to look up the word.  Cathartic means laxative or something used to purge or cleanse.  Nice to know.

Like I said, my blog is Cathartic.

I have decided what I would stand for should I ever run for public office.  A vote for me would be a vote for the elimination of Bureaucratic Waste.  We all say stuff like, "lower taxes," and "smaller government," but I have discovered what that means.  We are not against teachers and firefighters and good roads.  We are against waste.  We are against the 15 national security agencies that serve as self-replicating employment shops.  How many agencies does it take to interpret a super-secret memo?  Apparently 15.

Some of you know about my bout with Immigration Services.  I married a foreign national and they told us, "You must get a green card for her to enter."  She got a green card and came and went several times over the next 2 years.  They then said, "No more green card for you."  The reason: She didn't live here full time.  No green card means she can't even visit.  Why, because she is married to me and might attempt to stay.  They told her she couldn't live here because she didn't already live here and then told her she couldn't visit because she didn't have a green card and may want to live here.  Just like the time they turned down (a few years back) a request for her to extend her 6 month visit.  We filled out a form called, "Request to extend your stay."  It was turned down because, "It appears you want to extend your stay."  This entire paragraph is true!!  As opposed to much of what I write - stuff that I invent it in my head.

The Department of Homeland Security is responsible for the 15 security agencies, the need to check your toothpaste at the gate and Immigration Services.  If elected, my first job would be the elimination of this department.  In fact, I may deport the whole batch and make them follow their own rules for gaining reentry.

Now that I'm on the political stump, I just want to say, Meg Whitman is a joke.  Jerry Brown has run one television ad.  In it, he says specifically what he wants to do.  Meg has spend over 115 million dollars telling me about the crime rate in Oakland.  When confronted by some students on her negative ads, she responded, "I have a duty to point out Jerry Brown's record."  What she has done is paid someone to find a disparaging statistic and then she tells us about it on television.  I guess that makes her qualified to do what....spend money?  Saying, "The crime rate in Oakland went up 50%" implies that she has a plan.  What it really means is that she found a stat and is acting like its all his fault and she has some magic to make it better.  I can Google Oakland's record on crime myself.  I want to know what She will do.  So far - nothing.

Now, I have to mention food.

I was in Chicago's O'hare airport on Wednesday.  I managed to not stop at Johnny Rocket for a double cheese and grease burger.  I almost rewarded myself with a Johnny Rocket Milk Shake but then realized I might as well eat some Peanut M&Ms.  So, I head to my gate where my plane was delayed for about an hour.  No problem, I spent the time staring at the Chocolate covered nut stand right there at the gate.  The only way I was able to withstand the temptation was to turn my back on the stand and walk right into the food court where I bought a large frozen chocolate yogurt.  My will is strong...except in the face of temptation.

My business partner is this super-genius kind of guy.  He has invented his own App for those of you with an Android phone.  Apparently, these phones are power hogs.  If you forget to turn it off or plug it in at night, you wake up with a brick.  His App will turn off you phone's biggest power suckers at night and then turn it back on in the morning.  Here is a link to his App: http://droidtoolworks.com/sleepy-android/  I may have led him to believe that people actually read my blog.  He expects this to go viral so be the first on your block to own one.

And finally, Senator Diane Feinstein and her aide, Jessica Hartzell, fixed my wife's immigration problem so I want to publicly say thank you to both of them.  I sat next to Senator Feinstein on a plane last year.  I didn't know it was her.  My first words were, "Has anyone ever told you that you look just like Senator Feinstein?"  And she replies, "Yes, I get that a lot."

Lest I forget, a tip-of-the-hat to all of my FB friends.  I'm sure their positive thoughts helped.

Until I am elected to office, or maybe decide to run, I will lurk in the shadows doing what I do best...

World Saving...

Up, up and away...

j

Tea Party

I am not the least bit certain about what the Tea Party stands for so this blog is truly a View From The Cheap Seats.









Here is what I think they are:

• An off-shoot of the GOP that is tired of those currently pretending to be Republicans.  As such, they are part of the "Throw the bums out," gang and as far as that goes, I am with them.
• They appear to be a bit naive.  For example, they think the president controls the economy; or they want you to think he does so they can blame him.  They think that the economy turns on a dime. 
•  They tend to get all fired up over statements like, "You betcha I support those constitutional values."  I don't even know what that means.  Especially when they want to change the constitution with regards to birthers.
•  They want a smaller government but are the first to demand the government improve education and plug wells in the gulf.  I have yet to see a Tea Party person specifically say what they would cut.  I want a smaller government which is a government that provides all of the current services but has ZERO waste.  What that means specifically, I have no idea.  I do know that I can walk into any government office and find waste.  To see what I mean, spend time looking around the next time you are in the DMV.  Just the pace of work alone is a waste.
• I tend associate the Tea Party with being Anti-Gay and racially bigoted. I don't know if this is true and I am certain they would deny it.
• Overall, I think the Tea Party is made up of people that are angry and somehow think a pep rally will solve everything.  It looks like they are going to get a few people into office.  I'm happy for this.  I want to see what they can do.  I hope they surprise me.

A couple of miscellaneous political notes:

I support any effort to get rid of Nancy Peloci.  The Do-Nothing GOP is just following a script created by Pelosi when the GOP was in power.  She strong-armed the Dems into voting as a single block.  It worked and that was the turning point.  Now we have a government in the ditch.

The tax cut extension:  The GOP is calling the failure to extend it a "tax hike."  This is just bullshit.  The deadline for it to expire was created at the time of its initial passage so if its a tax hike, blame Bush.  Secondly, extending the cut to the rich is just ridiculous.  We would just be paying our taxes to those that don't need them.  Why are Democrats starting to support the idea of extending the cut to the rich?  Simple, the rich get people elected.  In the United States, it's not "One person, one vote."  It's really, "One dollar, one vote."  If that is not the case, how can you explain Meg Whitman.

Here is an example of how the Glenn Beck/Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannitys of the world work.  They act like they are giving you the inside information.  "Trust me" is what they say.  Then Hannity, plays a clip of Obama saying, "I want to raise the taxes on every single American."  He has it right there on a clip and acts as if he has just proven that Obama is out to get us.  Then, on The Daily Show, they play the entire clip where Obama says something like, "The GOP would have you believe that I want to raise the taxes on every single American.  That is simply not true."  Now, you have to believe that Hannity knew what the entire clip said so he intentionally LIED to his audience.  These guys are no different than the white collar ponzi schemers or the people that robbed homes in San Bruno while the victims huddled by red cross vans at a mall parking lot.

Speaking of dishonesty.  Meg Whitman is playing an ad on Jerry Brown that she knows is inaccurate.  It comes down to this - How many votes will she lose because people found out she is lying verses how many votes will she gain by people that see the ad and don't know she is lying.  So for, she is keeping the ad.

There you have it.  Back to saving the world.

Up, up and away...

j

Sex-cettera

I was having coffee with Scott, a friend of mine, yesterday.  As with most men, the subject eventually got around to sex.  I don't know how it came up.  With men, sex coming up in a conversation has less to do with the "free association" of the conversation and more to do with the amount of time that has passed since it was last brought it up for discussion.  Every 5-7 minutes, we have to talk about sex.  It's not part of the "male code of conduct."  It's more like breathing - we don't have a choice in the matter.

So Scott brings it up.

This time its about a Mastif and a really small dog whose breed escapes me for the moment but I think it was sort of terrierish.  Now, this is the second,completely separate, dog/sex conversation I  had in 10 minutes.  Earlier, Mike, also at coffee, told me how a Yorkie or something like that, would wait for his Golden Labrador to fall asleep.  The Yorkie would then attempt to mount the big dog somewhere between the neck and mid-back area.  The lab would just lay there and the Yorkie would go to work...

But back to Scott's story...

It seems the male Mastif somehow mated with this little terrier.  I'm assuming a step ladder or something was involved.  The terrier eventually had puppies.  When I asked how they came out, Scott's comment was something like, "I think the puppies were fine but it must have wrecked the mom."  Now, before you get all "pro-dog" on me, I'm sure the mom healed up just fine.  However, listening to how Scott matter-of-factly summarized the event struck me as extremely funny.

More on the sexual front.  It seems that a certain variety of female snail does not leave a sex-trace in her slime trail.  Now, we all know that male snails depend on this trace so they can tell a female snail from a male one.  But, for this one species, the only way a male can find out is by trial and error.  The result is an "Inordinately high incidence of male coupling."  What a funny  line to find in a professional research document.

In other news, Iran is trying to see if they can turn student tourists into cash.  They are ransoming off one of their "enemies of state" for $500,000.  Yes, they want the cash for one of the three students they caught picking flowers along the border over a year ago.

I had this sort of thing happen to a guy I know in Mexico.  He was a bounty hunter that got caught hauling around a fugitive in his trunk.  The bounty hunter, my friend, was tossed in a Mexican jail.  The local authorities continually asked his family for money to feed him and to prepare his defense.  When the family ran out of money, the Mexican prison released him.  I guess they had no use for a cow that didn't provide any more milk.

Back to Iran.  I never thought that they would ransom out these kids for money.  All along I assumed the intention was to ransom them out for nuclear weapons.  What can we expect from a country that (a) claims the Holocaust never happened, and (b) has as its stated aim the complete destruction of Israel and (c) claims that there are no homosexuals in their country.  This is who we are having to deal with.

I thought I would add a quick note on food.  I have noticed a lot of postings about M&Ms and SPAM.  While these both taste great, they should never be eaten together.  By that I mean, never push M&Ms into your SPAM and then make a sandwich out of it.  No, it's better to have a bowl of M&Ms as the main course with SPAM on the side.  Be sure to cleanse your palate between bites with a slice of cucumber.

A word on the economy.  China is a'coming.  They are already taking over Eastern Europe.  They have already passed Japan as far as GNP goes.  We are still way ahead of them, but not for long.  Do you have a plan?  I do. "Made in China" has to go.  Bring back manufacturing to the United States before its too late.

More on this later.  For now, I have a world to save.

Up, up and away...

j

Overheard

Here are a few things I have recently overheard lately.

Yesterday, a woman in front of me was walking down the jet way to get on an airplane.  She was roughly the size of a 777 engine and looked like she needed to shave.  Speaking loudly into a phone, "Tell him I'll go out with him but there will be no oral sex...that's right, no happy ending on the first date."

Last summer, I joined a bonfire at a beach cabin near lake Balaton in Hungary.  A woman was telling a story about the family that lived next to the cabin they were renting.  She said, "This woman drags something out into the back yard.  As I walk by, on my way to the beach, I see that the "thing" she was dragging was a man who had no legs.  She apparently just dragged him out there so he could enjoy the sunny day.   Not only did he have no legs, he was completely naked and began to masturbate enthusiastically as I walked by."

I just came home from a business trip and I am speaking with my daughter, Cory, about how things are going.  She tells me a story about he friend who works as a dental assistant.  Apparently two other people in the dental office, a man and a woman, were married to each other.  That was before the man woke up gay.  Now they are just friends.  Together they have a 13 year old daughter.  The man has a boyfriend that went to beauty school with my daughter.  He's apparently one of those "look how gay I can be" type of people.  Cory mentioned how the dental gay guy spoiled the hairdresser gay guy.  She also said the hairdresser gay guy didn't like the dental gay guy's daughter.  For some reason, this all struck me as very funny, especially coming from my daughter.  She went on to tell me how the two men went on an annual cruise ship for gay people only.  I'm thinking, "How romantic" when she tells me that they have an open relationship and basically see how much "other" stuff they can do, apparently not with each other, while on the ship.

Hmmmm - I'm only 52 and I still sometimes think, "What a long strange trip it's been."

My son, Matt, always has something unbelievable to tell me when I get home from a trip.  This time it was that a couple of days ago, a  sister of a friend's brother met a guy at a bar.  They got very friendly but she declined an invitation to go home with him.  The next morning, she had sores on her mouth.  A doctor looked at them and got excited.  Apparently, she had a disease that only comes from dead people.  The police were notified and they found the guy from the night before.  When they got to his house, they found several bodies of women that he has brought home and apparently, munched on!?

That kind of thing almost never happens to me.

Overheard while standing in line, "Two things I will never try are liquid cocaine and sex with an alligator."

I see the Quaran burning thing is not going to happen.  I now find myself somewhat relieved.  The reason for the burn, to protest the mosque in New York, was ridiculous.  I have always thought that.  The preacher wanted to burn the Quaran simply to offend.  I was against it.  However, when threats came in that if he was to burn it, people would be killed, I changed my position.  I don't negotiate with terrorists and that was what it was.  "Do only what we allow you to do or we will kill you" is the message I got.

We caved.

This is not something new.  We cave all the time.  I can't bring toothpaste onto an airplane because we caved.  I have to take off my shoes to go through screening because we caved.  I sometimes think that the world's terrorist networks are nothing more than a bunch of pranksters.  They sit in caves and try to come up with ways to make us afraid of the most ridiculous things.

And finally, Ballard Street, the comic strip, was really funny today.  Don't take my word for it.  Ask Wesley.

I would go on but you know how it is - I have a world to save.

Up, up and away.

J

Burn it!

I have been watching this whole "I'm gonna build a mosque - oh, yeah? - Yeah! - Well I'm gonna burn the Quaran" thing and have found it to be quite childish.  It's like gradeschool boys behind the backstop at school trying to see who can piss the farthest - boy does that take me back...

but I digress...

Let me start with a little story before I express my newest opinion on this issue.

About 25 years ago, I am sitting on a naval destroyer piddling around in the middle of the Pacific Ocean; a task we fondly referred to as "missile sponge" duty.  Anyway, this small island nation announced that it was claiming all waters around itself out to a distance of 50 miles.  This meant if you were inside this zone, you were trespassing.  Well, the United States only recognizes 12 miles. In response to the "mouse that roared" we were immediately sent to park ourselves 12 miles off of their coast.  We stayed for a few days and then left.  the message was clear.  The issue was resolved and now we never have to deal with a singular nation claiming more than its share of the ocean.

So now, the mosque is going to be built and this preacher, in retaliation, is going to publicly burn a copy of the Quaran.  My initial thought was, "Really?  Seems like you will needlessly be stirring up a screaming hoard of Heathen Stoners.

General Petraeus has come out and said that such an act will needlessly stir up the Afghans he is working with and put our soldiers at risk.  (Please keep in mind I have no children in uniform so the following reflects that.)

Now this feels completely different to me.  Forget about the mosque.  What has happened here is that we have finally begun to negotiate with terrorists.

The Muslim nations are telling us that if we do something that they don't approve of - if we do something that specifically demonstrates how free we really are - if we don't behave as they tell us to, they will attack our families; specifically the children many Americans have overseas.  They threaten violence in our cities.

All because we have the right to burn a book and they don't want us to.

If we give in here, what is next?  A Muslim woman in the Bronx commits adultery - They hear about it and insist we stone her to death.  I can see you saying that this is completely different from needlessly stirring up the nomadic masses.  I don't think so.  Depriving us of our first amendment rights is big stuff.

Now, if I were in Iran and the law forbade me to burn the Quaran and I did it anyway, then I feel I would justifiably be subjected to their legal system.  However, we are not in Iran.  This is America.  No religion, no government, no anything from the outside can tell us how to behave in Our House!

Don't burn it to protest the Mosque.  Don't burn it because it's a Muslim thing.

I really wish this had nothing to do with religion because for me, it doesn't.  I disagree with the reverend in Florida.  He actions seem to be based on attacking the Muslim religion which seems petty to me.  I am not on his side as far as that rationale goes.

For me, it's more like this.  Suppose I am at a car dealership, ready to buy a car.  The only thing I am not sure about is the color.  Now suppose a man comes in and says, "If you buy the blue car, I will harm you."  The very next words out of my mouth would be, "I'll take the blue one."  This is possibly not the best example because one could argue that the man is really controlling my behavior knowing that I would do what he told me not to do - but I think you get the point.

Burn it because you are not willing to give up the right to do so.

Whew.....I feel kind of strong about this.

But alas, I have a world to save.

Up, up and away...

j

The good, the bad and the Ridiculous

Okay, I am going to try something different today.  I am going to make a list off of the top of my head.  The list will occur in the order dictated by today's blog title.

The Good:  Cottage cheese mixed with salsa.  This is really, really good.  Possibly only second to Peanut M&M's.

The Bad: High Tech companies like Microsoft and Apple which try to maximize profits by restricting your options.  They should take a look at the Google model.  Bye-bye to Office and Internet explore; to i-phones and i-tunes.  Hello Google voice and android phones.

The Ridiculous: Glenn Beck saying, "Americans, our children are being submerged into the world of communism."  I want to get a job writing for this guy.  I can make up stuff as fast as anyone.  95% of all Americans agree with me on this.

The Good: The Family Guy is the funniest show on television.  This show constantly challenges me to not be offended by what I have been taught (no, not taught by my mom) to be offended by.  Very clever.  I would like to write for this show as well.

The Bad: Never, ever, try to eat a carbohydrate-free tortilla.

The Ridiculous: I think Keith Olbermann of Countdown would be out of a job if he didn't have Glenn Beck to make fun of.

The Good: Staying in touch with old friends.  Imagine you live in a giant house and every friend you ever had had their own room.  You could walk down the hall and open the door labeled Wesley D. and there he would be reading the funny papers.  You could do this over and over with all of your friends.  Or you could choose not to; walking instead, ever forward, making new friends and then leaving them behind as well.  Hmmm sounds like a good story in the making.

The Bad: My back.  After 3 days of golfing, I woke up a week ago last Monday and found I couldn't stand up.  I needed to catch a plane so I packed by crawling around my room, reaching up over my head into drawers trying to find my underwear.  It's been 11 days now but I am getting better.

The Ridiculous: Is it just me or is Sarah Palin becoming a parody of herself - sort of like William Shatner.

The Good: I love the coming of fall.  I like getting up in the morning and feeling a coolness in the air.  I like seeing the leaves fall and the way the sun shines in patches through gathering clouds.

The Bad: Rachael Maddow.  She always seems to be talking down to me.  She has a snide attitude which says, "I know you agree with me because I'm smart."  Fortunately, The Simpsons are on at the same time.

The Ridiculous: California Labor laws.  I once called and talked to the author about a few points.  I then talked to a person in charge of enforcing the code.  Turns out the two disagree on almost everything.  It's like one is saying, "That's not what I meant when I wrote that." and the other says, "Yes it is."  There is actually a document written to help decipher the labor code.  It is more than twice as long as the code itself.  I work all over the country.  Everywhere except...California.  This state is in debt because no manufacturing wants to come here.  The reason - labor laws.  California is not just the most unfriendly state, it's restrictive laws are some of the worse in the world.

The good: Family

The bad: Out of season peaches from Safeway

The Ridiculous: I like it freezing in my bedroom at night while I sleep under a giant pile of blankets.  Since the local housing snobs won't let me have a small air conditioner in my window, I need to cool down my entire house.


That's about it for now.  May you have more than you share of good, a minute serving of bad for contrast and as much ridiculous as you can handle.

I have a world to save.

Up, up and away...
j

We're all the same - in different ways

I recently went to my uncle's birthday party.  Several of my family members were there.  As seems to be the case in recent years, conversations often turned to politics.

Now you might think that kids that grew up together in the same house in a small town (Wasco, CA), would all think the same about something as important as politics.

Turns out not to be the case.

Amongst us, including more distant relatives, there were Democrats, Republicans and Tea Partys.  Yes, one relative actually wants Sarah Palin to run for president.

Throughout the numerous discussions, I looked for similarities rather than how we differ.  Here are some of my findings.

What does the statement "I want a small government." mean?  My first thought is that you must be a Republican.  However, what it really means has much more universal appeal.  We all want a strong defense.  We want Medicare and Social Security.  We want to be able to collect taxes and we all want public libraries.  What we don't want is unnecessary spending.  I saw a news article this week where 5 billion in spending was wasted in rebuilding Iraq.  I recently saw that there are 15 security agencies, none of which talk to each other and most spend time duplicating the work of each other.  That kind of stuff burns me up.

So, when a politician says, "I want a smaller government," ask them to be more specific because everyone wants that; both parties want that.  So, ask the politician what they would cut.  Is it going to be education?  Highway funds? Don't let them get away with saying, "You know, stuff.  I would cut stuff.  Waste and stuff."

There has never been a politician that has run on the policy of supporting wasteful spending and yet both major parties would have you believe just that about their opponent.

Another one is health care.  It seems that everyone wants lower health costs.  Obama care is making insurance companies spend 85% of their income on patients instead of 75%.  Everyone should like that.  Obama care means that my 22 year old daughter can be put on my policy at the end of the year, at no additional cost to me.  I see nothing to not like about that.  No one wants the government to run a healthcare company but they all want the government to make the insurance companies behave.  Obama care is not the government running health care.  It is just a bit of legislation to make the health care companies behave.  Most would like to see the health care tort system reigned in but let's face it, all of our lawmakers were lawyers to begin with.  They aren't going to do anything in this area.

Another issue is Finance Reform.

Ask anyone the following question: "Should the government pass laws that make our financial systems behave or should we trust the banks to do that on their own?"  No one trusts the banks so we all agree on the legislation to make them behave.  Those against it would have you believe the government has become a bank.  That is simply not the case.

We all agree that jobs are important.  We all want a comprehensive energy policy.  We all want the world to be at peace.  These are things we all want.  I can't see Obama saying, "Naw, jobs are not important."  It just doesn't happen.  Opposition parties will have you believe that they are the only ones that want these things.

We all agree that those in politics now have jumped off the tracks.

Let me summarize what EVERYONE wants:

Cheap and comprehensive health care
No wasteful spending
More jobs
Cheap and plentiful energy
Sound financial systems
Better politicians

How can we all want the same thing and then argue about who is right?  My guess is that somewhere along the line, we were imprinted with a perspective.  All of our arguing is basically trying to get everyone else to see our perspective, in spite of the fact that what we all want is all the same.

So, if we all want these things, how do we know who to vote for.  If everyone gets up and says the same things, how will we be able to differentiate?

My advice is to listen for one of the following three things.  If you hear one of them, then vote for the other person.

1. The politician gives a speech (or commercial) talking about how bad their opponent is rather than highlighting their own personal strengths.
2. The politician claims that they support any of the Universal things that people want and imply that their opponent does not.
3.  The politician says blah, blah, blah God Bless America.  This says several things.  First of all, it implies that their opponent is not as patriotic as they are.  Secondly, it says they have no position of substance.

I intend to watch their eyes.  John Boehner was on Meet the Press and got caught disagreeing with Alan Greenspan.  I could see in his eyes he got caught not knowing what he was talking about.

I will vote for the one that is not afraid to stand up and say, "These are the things that I stand for."  I will not vote for popular dogma.  I will not vote for the one that can afford the biggest smear campaign.

I will vote for the one that I feel is telling me the truth and its a truth that I also believe in.

Speaking of Truth Justice, and the American Way,

I have a world to save.

Up, up and away.

j